Pelo

I know it's very not healthy for me posting shits I've experienced but don't care. I hate everyone and everything. Why do I feel this way? I hate it. My gosh  I hate what I feel right now

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effortless

Makisina nak and yet syak ti agsangsangit nakakaisnis haan man lang ageffort. I was expecting nga ibaga ana okay lang if I say break kamin pero it still hurts. Nagpelo naglaka lang kinyana nga makisina kinyak while I'm dying inside. Kayat ku iriyaw ti sakit nakum ku but all I can do is to silently wipe my tears. Panpanunutuk kasanu na mahandle nga awan nak, kunak nu makisina nak ayusin nakunak nu ibaga na nga itama na Amin kunak nu agplease isuna nga dikami agsina. Ngum ibaga na go lang? Sobrang nagsakit nakita naiggaman na Amin kinyakun pero okay lang kinyana nga maawan nak. Baga na ayayatun nak ngum okay lang nga maawan nak.ibaga na ipaglaban nak ngum okay la g kinyana nga agsina kami.haan ku man lang maranasan nga ipaglaban. Nagsakit! Karkaru pay ngum ajay pinagsasau da mama kinyak sobra sobra nga hanku Ammu nu agsardung pay ti sangit ku. Bagak ready nakun ngum nagsakit latta. 
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What was I made for?

 I use to think I'm just unlucky but now i learned that i am not unlucky nor i was not love,  by my friends my family and everyone around me including this neighborhood of mine. i hate it i fucking hate this. What did i do wrong? God i dont want to blame you but i just cant and im so sorry for that. Growing up without feeling love is just the biggest the pain I'll ever have, forgot the embarrassment they cause me huh. Gosh i hate this life! i feel so useless, unworthy irresponsible and every negative energy. How and when can i feel the love that i  should've felt ever since i was a child. i hate this. i hate all of you. And you know what hurts the most? The pain is inevitable since the family that should protect me are the ones causing me pain and even my boyfriend they are all together in this my gosh they all give me different kind of pain and ofcourse i dont enjoy it i hope you feel the same too. i hope you guys will feel regretful when you hurt me. 
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